walking on the topless beach...i noticed...tits...strange...i
kept on feeling somewhat compelled to compliment the ladies on their firmness , tenderness and even tan...yet
i was aware that this would have been a bad idea...in fact, i
felt that i wasnt supposed to even notice.
lets get it straight...if you go to a topless beach , then
people will notice your breasts...even if they swing in
the wind , or hang down to your knees...frig...especially
if they hang down to your knees.
it is not just the alcoholic that lives in denial...in fact
, everyone of us is there to one extent or another...choosing
to believe what we want to believe...truth fades into obscurity
and is feared any time it even attempts to come into the
general direction of the one who is disregarding it...
one of the few common denominators of virtually all of mankind
is that there is a feeling of fear and disdain for what
makes them feel uncomfortable...therefore the world of most
individuals consists of a series of avoidances of particular
truths that upset the particular individual.
in rich countries it is far worse...as money and even entertainment
can bring avoidance to a whole new level..the desire to
escape from reality that is birthed in the heart is made
manifest by means of buying , drugging or even hiding in
front of a movie screen...it is not a coincidence that entertainment
is a multi-billion dollar industry...the average person
watches three hours of TV. a day...even teenagers feel
compelled to masturbate while being visually stimulated...terrified
of their own thoughts to the extent that they must be replaced
by the images presented by others...sick fuckers for the
most part .
personally , if i am going to screw my life up...i would
like to do it myself...i will face my pain then run away
from it if i cant deal with it appropriately...yet it will
be mine...i will embrace it and discover its meaning...i
will attempt to deal with it...and if i cant...at least
i will know what is going on inside of me...and , over the
course of time , maybe there will be some progress made...maybe
not .
chapter 28
indeed , the subject of teenage masturbation...the most
wonderful thing about it is that it can continue long after
you ''grow up"and enter adult land...sex without commitment
and responsibility...nobody has to pay...nobody gets hurt...nobody
goes away feeling unsure about the future with their partner...it
is no wonder the church disdains such practices...they cant
even tax it...and there are no babies being produced that
grow up and give them money...it must be a sin!!!
whereas god is concerned with allowing us to have free will
at great personal cost...the institution of religion seems
to be mainly concerned with control and manipulation...making
people do what they desire them to do for their benefit
, in one way or another...that is to say , for the most
part , religion is diametrically opposed to the teachings
of christ , as given to us in the books of the four gospels.
the dynamic of controlling another is , in a very profound
way , a form of cannibalism...the consuming of another for
what is perceived to be for ones benefit...only we distinguish
between flesh and soul...personally , id rather have someone
eat my body and put me out of my misery , than eat my soul...and
have me still physically alive , though inwardly dead.
do you know what the worst thing about jerking-off is??? its
doing it in the shower in cap di...there were no taps on
the showers...just some fucking reset button that had to
be...well...reset...it was about seven strokes of my dick
to every one push of the...thing...i personally believe
that this was designed by some religious fanatic that figured
he had some revelation from god to extinguish the demon
of masturbation...can you imagine how frustrating it must
be dedicating your life to the cause of getting people to
stop masturbating??? i wonder if you could get registered
as a non-profit charity??? can you imagine how
screwed up the board meetings would be???
wonderful thing about it is that it can continue long after
you ''grow up"and enter adult land...sex without commitment
and responsibility...nobody has to pay...nobody gets hurt...nobody
goes away feeling unsure about the future with their partner...it
is no wonder the church disdains such practices...they cant
even tax it...and there are no babies being produced that
grow up and give them money...it must be a sin!!!
whereas god is concerned with allowing us to have free will
at great personal cost...the institution of religion seems
to be mainly concerned with control and manipulation...making
people do what they desire them to do for their benefit
, in one way or another...that is to say , for the most
part , religion is diametrically opposed to the teachings
of christ , as given to us in the books of the four gospels.
the dynamic of controlling another is , in a very profound
way , a form of cannibalism...the consuming of another for
what is perceived to be for ones benefit...only we distinguish
between flesh and soul...personally , id rather have someone
eat my body and put me out of my misery , than eat my soul...and
have me still physically alive , though inwardly dead.
do you know what the worst thing about jerking-off is??? its
doing it in the shower in cap di...there were no taps on
the showers...just some fucking reset button that had to
be...well...reset...it was about seven strokes of my dick
to every one push of the...thing...i personally believe
that this was designed by some religious fanatic that figured
he had some revelation from god to extinguish the demon
of masturbation...can you imagine how frustrating it must
be dedicating your life to the cause of getting people to
stop masturbating??? i wonder if you could get registered
as a non-profit charity??? can you imagine how
screwed up the board meetings would be???
chapter 29
the buildings of monico reminded me of erect cocks...they
were a monument to mans desire to conquer and control...if
you had no money...you had no power...therefore...you werent
welcome in monaco.
so there was this crazy bitch who was obviously mentally
ill...i almost wanted to follow her to see how she would
be accepted in this fucked-up little town...i did not
however...i just continued on my journey.
the worst thing about money is that people think that they
can define their worth by having it...and the more that
they have...the better they are as people.
this allows for no growth at a11...if being rich makes you
good...then being a rich murderer makes you no better or
worse than a rich person who hasnt killed anyone.
if you are defined by any one quality...unless it is love...you
are fucked...nothing allows anyone to get away with anything...lets
put it this way...if you screw around on your wife...it
will hurt her...she will feel-and be-betrayed...even a trillion
dollars wont change that .
we look for reasons to define ourselves by something besides
what we really are...probably because we are all such fucking
idiots...what we dont realize is that this is fine...we
are idiots loved by god...and if we could disregard our
pride for even a second...we would see how beautiful that
this is.
the truth of the matter is that i left monico feeling like
i didnt belong...too bad...i feel that god makes people
rich to allow them the opportunity to give to others...where
has the world gone wrong...you may not realize it...but
this is really scary shit.
were a monument to mans desire to conquer and control...if
you had no money...you had no power...therefore...you werent
welcome in monaco.
so there was this crazy bitch who was obviously mentally
ill...i almost wanted to follow her to see how she would
be accepted in this fucked-up little town...i did not
however...i just continued on my journey.
the worst thing about money is that people think that they
can define their worth by having it...and the more that
they have...the better they are as people.
this allows for no growth at a11...if being rich makes you
good...then being a rich murderer makes you no better or
worse than a rich person who hasnt killed anyone.
if you are defined by any one quality...unless it is love...you
are fucked...nothing allows anyone to get away with anything...lets
put it this way...if you screw around on your wife...it
will hurt her...she will feel-and be-betrayed...even a trillion
dollars wont change that .
we look for reasons to define ourselves by something besides
what we really are...probably because we are all such fucking
idiots...what we dont realize is that this is fine...we
are idiots loved by god...and if we could disregard our
pride for even a second...we would see how beautiful that
this is.
the truth of the matter is that i left monico feeling like
i didnt belong...too bad...i feel that god makes people
rich to allow them the opportunity to give to others...where
has the world gone wrong...you may not realize it...but
this is really scary shit.
chapter 30
there was this baptist ass hole...he wanted to argue with
me about...toilet paper...or something like that...all i
wanted to do was relax...right after i beat the shit out
of him...but good ministers dont do this kind of thing .
thirty minutes later , he wanted me to take his picture
on an island that i was beginning to consider somewhat sacred...as
he made the hundred meter walk...i cant tell you how tempted
i was to take a picture of my dick when he wasnt looking...i
laughed so hard that i cried just thinking about it.
our emotions arnt bad...its what we do with them that can
be potentially be bad...if we could just accept ourselves
as we are....we could embrace ourselves and then deal with
our entire personhood in a complete and wonderful way.
1 refused to hate myself for wanting to kill the ass hole...nor
for wanting to shock him...i simply allowed myself to feel
humble for my desires...it was a beautiful day...no one
should have the right to spoil that...i saw gods love...not
some ignorant prick that reminded me of those who destroyed
my joy some six or so years ago...i let the day go down
fine...by gods mercy.
feelings are just feelings...maybe the gospel message is
simply love...not just others , but ourselves..shit...do
you really think you can love and accept others if you cant
love and accept yourself??? you cant give what you dont have...i
promise you .
me about...toilet paper...or something like that...all i
wanted to do was relax...right after i beat the shit out
of him...but good ministers dont do this kind of thing .
thirty minutes later , he wanted me to take his picture
on an island that i was beginning to consider somewhat sacred...as
he made the hundred meter walk...i cant tell you how tempted
i was to take a picture of my dick when he wasnt looking...i
laughed so hard that i cried just thinking about it.
our emotions arnt bad...its what we do with them that can
be potentially be bad...if we could just accept ourselves
as we are....we could embrace ourselves and then deal with
our entire personhood in a complete and wonderful way.
1 refused to hate myself for wanting to kill the ass hole...nor
for wanting to shock him...i simply allowed myself to feel
humble for my desires...it was a beautiful day...no one
should have the right to spoil that...i saw gods love...not
some ignorant prick that reminded me of those who destroyed
my joy some six or so years ago...i let the day go down
fine...by gods mercy.
feelings are just feelings...maybe the gospel message is
simply love...not just others , but ourselves..shit...do
you really think you can love and accept others if you cant
love and accept yourself??? you cant give what you dont have...i
promise you .
chapter 31
it was night time again...the rum was cheap...perfect...the
sun was setting over the sea as the liquid began to wrap
around my tongue like a babies arms around her blanket...there
were lawyers at the table...beautiful , lush ,well plucked
lawyers...i could picture the one on the left fondling her
breasts behind her law book...there was a question that
i had always wanted to ask a lawyer...now was my chance...''
if space men came down to our planet with really big friggin
guns...the kind that could melt brains...would they still
be subject to our laws ?''
there is only one true law , actually...and that is love...if
we do this one simple thing then nothing else matters...we
are at one with god and each other .
what religion and , in fact , people as a whole dont seem
to understand is that law is a man made device...that reeks
with our sinful desires to control and manipulate and to
perceive ourselves as better than others...law is an evil
thing...and will be twisted to meet the needs of those who
have the power to put it in place and facilitate it.
the bible says that a woman who commits adultery should
be stoned to death...well , guess who does the stoning??? possibly
the same prick that she screwed in the first place...we
are also in deep shit if we mix two types of material...in
other words...i could go to hell for wearing my underwear.
i find it interesting that fundamentalist christians condemn
homosexuality because of some abstract references in the
old testament...they dont realize that they are entering
a world of mens perverted notion of gods character...the
perception of god through a vengeful and self-righteous
heart...using gods name for their own benefits...slandering
him along the way .
they also dont realize that once one steps outside of living
a life of simply embracing gods mercy...then
we have to be perfect...that is , keeping all parts of the
law in order to sustain ourselves and our identity.
this is not a heaven or hell thing...we will , however ,
judge ourselves in the way we judge others...and give ourselves
mercy if we choose to give mercy to others...this takes
place some where in our souls...a psychological pattern
we develop...that we will either live or die by
sun was setting over the sea as the liquid began to wrap
around my tongue like a babies arms around her blanket...there
were lawyers at the table...beautiful , lush ,well plucked
lawyers...i could picture the one on the left fondling her
breasts behind her law book...there was a question that
i had always wanted to ask a lawyer...now was my chance...''
if space men came down to our planet with really big friggin
guns...the kind that could melt brains...would they still
be subject to our laws ?''
there is only one true law , actually...and that is love...if
we do this one simple thing then nothing else matters...we
are at one with god and each other .
what religion and , in fact , people as a whole dont seem
to understand is that law is a man made device...that reeks
with our sinful desires to control and manipulate and to
perceive ourselves as better than others...law is an evil
thing...and will be twisted to meet the needs of those who
have the power to put it in place and facilitate it.
the bible says that a woman who commits adultery should
be stoned to death...well , guess who does the stoning??? possibly
the same prick that she screwed in the first place...we
are also in deep shit if we mix two types of material...in
other words...i could go to hell for wearing my underwear.
i find it interesting that fundamentalist christians condemn
homosexuality because of some abstract references in the
old testament...they dont realize that they are entering
a world of mens perverted notion of gods character...the
perception of god through a vengeful and self-righteous
heart...using gods name for their own benefits...slandering
him along the way .
they also dont realize that once one steps outside of living
a life of simply embracing gods mercy...then
we have to be perfect...that is , keeping all parts of the
law in order to sustain ourselves and our identity.
this is not a heaven or hell thing...we will , however ,
judge ourselves in the way we judge others...and give ourselves
mercy if we choose to give mercy to others...this takes
place some where in our souls...a psychological pattern
we develop...that we will either live or die by
chapter 32
the strangest thing about my discovery of the nude beach...was
not that i saw a man that looked just like elton john...but
that sir elton actually lived only a few miles down the
road...and , in fact ,a friend of mine had seen him in the
airport a few days before this experience...could it be??? no
, impossible...and , besides , elton could afford a better
cock than this guy...i couldnt help but stare at this fellow...maybe
if he hadnt been completely naked...i would have been more
comfortable conversing with him .
the nude beach was actually a minor let down...i thought
that these people would be naked as a metaphoric expression
for wanting to be transparent and real with each other..not
even close...they weren't as repressed and anal as what one
confronts in the average evangelical church...but learning
to love and accept and be free was not the motivation for
most of them being in this particular state .
there are many ways to be religious...pretending one is
ethically and spiritually superior to another is most often
the objective...that is , your way is better than another
way...but there are as many paths to achieve this as there
are people in the world.
i remember sitting in church thinking that all of the people
shared the same belief structure...it was bull shit...get
them drunk enough...honest enough...and the discovery is
that there are more differences than similarities...only
the surface beliefs are the same...and , quite often , only
because people are afraid of being found out to be committing
blasphemy.
this was just another religion , for the most part...if
you kept your bathing suit on...then you were shunned by
those who were naked...they had made their own set of arbitrary
standards that had to be lived up to...god is love , acceptance
and forgiveness...and how we run away from this truth...in
so many different directions.
not that i saw a man that looked just like elton john...but
that sir elton actually lived only a few miles down the
road...and , in fact ,a friend of mine had seen him in the
airport a few days before this experience...could it be??? no
, impossible...and , besides , elton could afford a better
cock than this guy...i couldnt help but stare at this fellow...maybe
if he hadnt been completely naked...i would have been more
comfortable conversing with him .
the nude beach was actually a minor let down...i thought
that these people would be naked as a metaphoric expression
for wanting to be transparent and real with each other..not
even close...they weren't as repressed and anal as what one
confronts in the average evangelical church...but learning
to love and accept and be free was not the motivation for
most of them being in this particular state .
there are many ways to be religious...pretending one is
ethically and spiritually superior to another is most often
the objective...that is , your way is better than another
way...but there are as many paths to achieve this as there
are people in the world.
i remember sitting in church thinking that all of the people
shared the same belief structure...it was bull shit...get
them drunk enough...honest enough...and the discovery is
that there are more differences than similarities...only
the surface beliefs are the same...and , quite often , only
because people are afraid of being found out to be committing
blasphemy.
this was just another religion , for the most part...if
you kept your bathing suit on...then you were shunned by
those who were naked...they had made their own set of arbitrary
standards that had to be lived up to...god is love , acceptance
and forgiveness...and how we run away from this truth...in
so many different directions.
chapter 33
my assessment of the teenage world is that each and every
one of them believes that they know some cosmic truth that
their parents know absolutely nothing about...as a result
, they feel obliged to make up their own set of rules...hardly
even taking into consideration the mind set of those who
have gone before them .
strangely enough , i feel that they have a point...that
is , at this stage of life...children are awakened to the
possibility of what life could be...hence , the frustration
of seeing a world that has obviously gone wrong.
what the dumb fuckers dont realize , however , is that their
parents were in the exact same place twenty or thirty years
before...they saw truth in front of their faces...and explored
it..right until the time , at age sixteen , or whatever...that
they became profoundly aware that following such a desire...was
frigging difficult..and it would cost .
the sad truth is that most kids begin to fold emotionally
right after their first lover turns out to be an ass hole...they
dont even come close to lasting until they learn that one
cannot be honest and integral in the office place and expect
to get anywhere...people have an allergic reaction to pain...and
we have a lust for pleasure...accompanied with a deep seeded
belief that life should be relatively easy...and that anything
hard isn't worth while.
essentially , the concept here is referred to as lusts of
the flesh...the looking for pleasure at the expense of higher
truths...it is , in fact , idolatry...as what is pure ,
beautiful and right...are no longer the most important things
in the universe...according to the owner of this mind set...self
gratification is the one true god...and anything in the
way must be dealt with regardless of the end result.
one of them believes that they know some cosmic truth that
their parents know absolutely nothing about...as a result
, they feel obliged to make up their own set of rules...hardly
even taking into consideration the mind set of those who
have gone before them .
strangely enough , i feel that they have a point...that
is , at this stage of life...children are awakened to the
possibility of what life could be...hence , the frustration
of seeing a world that has obviously gone wrong.
what the dumb fuckers dont realize , however , is that their
parents were in the exact same place twenty or thirty years
before...they saw truth in front of their faces...and explored
it..right until the time , at age sixteen , or whatever...that
they became profoundly aware that following such a desire...was
frigging difficult..and it would cost .
the sad truth is that most kids begin to fold emotionally
right after their first lover turns out to be an ass hole...they
dont even come close to lasting until they learn that one
cannot be honest and integral in the office place and expect
to get anywhere...people have an allergic reaction to pain...and
we have a lust for pleasure...accompanied with a deep seeded
belief that life should be relatively easy...and that anything
hard isn't worth while.
essentially , the concept here is referred to as lusts of
the flesh...the looking for pleasure at the expense of higher
truths...it is , in fact , idolatry...as what is pure ,
beautiful and right...are no longer the most important things
in the universe...according to the owner of this mind set...self
gratification is the one true god...and anything in the
way must be dealt with regardless of the end result.
chapter 34
the train eventually stopped at some medium sized down that
moses never visited...probably because there was no sea
to part...once you get good at a trick like that...you really
want to exploit it...shit...the men may have gotten excited
and self righteous...but the ladies would have been horny
and wet...think about it...it is within the nature of most
women to want to be protected...but to be supernaturally
protected...this is a state of being that very few could
ever resist.
what moses did was wonderful...yet the aftermath was never
discussed in the bible...that is,everyones wife wanting
to fuck moses...are you offended??? fuck you!!! if you know
anything about the history of israel...you are quite aware
that possibly the main issue that the lord , god , all mighty had
with these bastards was that they perpetually felt a need
to have their children butchered to foreign gods...slaughtered
, even...yet the reaction that one has to these people desiring
to screw their protector , unless i miscalculated , is one
of disdain and horror .
the caveman who got the best woman was not the one with
the biggest cock...nor was he the best looking...and he
sure as shit wasnt the most beautiful deep within...he was
the fucker who could slay the biggest mother fucking dinosaur
in the entire valley...and so it still is today...like it
or not.
the spirit within is easily disregarded...so it is , once
again , the desires of the flesh that rule virtually every
one of us...and they dictate to us that we need security...so
poets alike myself , who were completely abused as children...are
overlooked in terms of being mates by the rational members
of the female species...they look for ''the biggest club
'' instead .
ironically , in later life...people change their priorities...sometimes
because of a type of spiritual awakening...sometimes because
they simple become aware that the big club was beaten against
them as often as it was beaten against the dinosaurs head...that
is to say...time teaches those who want to learn...some
big fucking lessons .
in this small but beautiful town...i ran to the corner store
as fast as i could to buy the kids each a sandwich...i was
not their protector...i could not and cant even protect
myself...i just wanted to buy them something to eat...they
were wonderful kids .
moses never visited...probably because there was no sea
to part...once you get good at a trick like that...you really
want to exploit it...shit...the men may have gotten excited
and self righteous...but the ladies would have been horny
and wet...think about it...it is within the nature of most
women to want to be protected...but to be supernaturally
protected...this is a state of being that very few could
ever resist.
what moses did was wonderful...yet the aftermath was never
discussed in the bible...that is,everyones wife wanting
to fuck moses...are you offended??? fuck you!!! if you know
anything about the history of israel...you are quite aware
that possibly the main issue that the lord , god , all mighty had
with these bastards was that they perpetually felt a need
to have their children butchered to foreign gods...slaughtered
, even...yet the reaction that one has to these people desiring
to screw their protector , unless i miscalculated , is one
of disdain and horror .
the caveman who got the best woman was not the one with
the biggest cock...nor was he the best looking...and he
sure as shit wasnt the most beautiful deep within...he was
the fucker who could slay the biggest mother fucking dinosaur
in the entire valley...and so it still is today...like it
or not.
the spirit within is easily disregarded...so it is , once
again , the desires of the flesh that rule virtually every
one of us...and they dictate to us that we need security...so
poets alike myself , who were completely abused as children...are
overlooked in terms of being mates by the rational members
of the female species...they look for ''the biggest club
'' instead .
ironically , in later life...people change their priorities...sometimes
because of a type of spiritual awakening...sometimes because
they simple become aware that the big club was beaten against
them as often as it was beaten against the dinosaurs head...that
is to say...time teaches those who want to learn...some
big fucking lessons .
in this small but beautiful town...i ran to the corner store
as fast as i could to buy the kids each a sandwich...i was
not their protector...i could not and cant even protect
myself...i just wanted to buy them something to eat...they
were wonderful kids .
chapter 35
there is a vast cosmic truth behind buying someone a sandwich
that very few souls in the known universe are aware exists...that
is , once the sandwich is purchased there is potential power
and control happening between the giver and the recipient
of the object in question .
what if the kids saw me needy and weak...trying to buy their
affection for god knows what sort of reason??? what if they
felt in debt to me for the frigging bread and a strange
looking bun that these people seem to always put their lard
between???
the truth that is before us here is that most people really
dont believe in the overflowing transcending beauty of love...the
universe , instead , is seen as a power struggle...winning
affection...having something that another desires...even
having the ability to make another feel a certain way...which
is a very deceptive counterfeit to love...is what allows all
things to ebb and flow.
i could have told the little fuckers that i bought them
lunch to make myself feel good about myself...that would
have been a very plausible story...but , shit , it really
didnt matter...they were just kids...their hearts were not
aware that love is a very scarce commodity...more rare than
do-do birds...or even the homosexual version of big foot...love
is ,in fact , the most rare and precious of all things...as
jesus said :''a pearl of great price''
most people never learn how rare or how beautiful love is...they
either never really play ''the game''...or they never get
deep enough with even their spouses to see if the love and
acceptance is real or they arnt even looking for it in
the first place...just stimulation and good feelings , sexual
or otherwise...fuck , maybe they are just too stupid to
look back at their own personal history to see how things
fell apart over the course of a life time .
regardless , one wonder where sandwiches go sometimes...i
mean , besides the shit house and then back to the sea...strangely
enough...they werent even very good sandwiches.
that very few souls in the known universe are aware exists...that
is , once the sandwich is purchased there is potential power
and control happening between the giver and the recipient
of the object in question .
what if the kids saw me needy and weak...trying to buy their
affection for god knows what sort of reason??? what if they
felt in debt to me for the frigging bread and a strange
looking bun that these people seem to always put their lard
between???
the truth that is before us here is that most people really
dont believe in the overflowing transcending beauty of love...the
universe , instead , is seen as a power struggle...winning
affection...having something that another desires...even
having the ability to make another feel a certain way...which
is a very deceptive counterfeit to love...is what allows all
things to ebb and flow.
i could have told the little fuckers that i bought them
lunch to make myself feel good about myself...that would
have been a very plausible story...but , shit , it really
didnt matter...they were just kids...their hearts were not
aware that love is a very scarce commodity...more rare than
do-do birds...or even the homosexual version of big foot...love
is ,in fact , the most rare and precious of all things...as
jesus said :''a pearl of great price''
most people never learn how rare or how beautiful love is...they
either never really play ''the game''...or they never get
deep enough with even their spouses to see if the love and
acceptance is real or they arnt even looking for it in
the first place...just stimulation and good feelings , sexual
or otherwise...fuck , maybe they are just too stupid to
look back at their own personal history to see how things
fell apart over the course of a life time .
regardless , one wonder where sandwiches go sometimes...i
mean , besides the shit house and then back to the sea...strangely
enough...they werent even very good sandwiches.
chapter 36
how do you celebrate being in the most beautiful place in
the world??? you get loaded , of course...and not just on
mouthwash...but green chartreuse...and if you celebrate
any other way...its because you have a small penis !!!
how do i describe this beautiful fluid without getting
rude??? heres how...its like spices and rum between a tender
and richly dark womans legs...with hash smoke breathing
out of her vagina...as you both soak in the bubble bath.
we sat around the table and drank until we could drink no
more...somewhere between low and high...our spirits twirled
down the french alps right into a herd of sleeping ducks...that
laughed as we tickled their feathers.
drinking is such an interesting thing...ones inhibitions
go down...ones penis goes up...and one feels a need to disclose
ones true identity...be it reasonable, ridiculous or evil.
i think that our need to drink is directly related to our
need to be real...to express our emotions and have them
accepted as part of who we are...yet we cannot believe that
this could actually happen under normal circumstances...so
we introduce two new variables...first , there is the ''i
was drunk" thing...the perfect excuse , we believe, for revealing
what is truly within...and secondly , we also give ourselves
an irrational mind that we can hide behind as the truth
is leaving our mouths...that is , we simply dont give a
fuck...we have the courage to be honest because we , for
a few hours , believe that there are no consequences to
our honesty .
it all points to a desperate need to have love , acceptance
and forgiveness as an essential part of our lives...to be
forgiven and to forgive...what a concept...something that
could potentially heal the world...a wonderful idea...that
never seems to happen...so we find something that will simulate
this dynamic...booze.
we drank through the day and into the night...we learned
much about each other , the boys and i...and then there
were others that joined us...one of which was a beautiful
young lass from england...her hair hanging down in front
of her breasts...but besides that...nothing pissed me off
about her...she was indeed amazing .
the world??? you get loaded , of course...and not just on
mouthwash...but green chartreuse...and if you celebrate
any other way...its because you have a small penis !!!
how do i describe this beautiful fluid without getting
rude??? heres how...its like spices and rum between a tender
and richly dark womans legs...with hash smoke breathing
out of her vagina...as you both soak in the bubble bath.
we sat around the table and drank until we could drink no
more...somewhere between low and high...our spirits twirled
down the french alps right into a herd of sleeping ducks...that
laughed as we tickled their feathers.
drinking is such an interesting thing...ones inhibitions
go down...ones penis goes up...and one feels a need to disclose
ones true identity...be it reasonable, ridiculous or evil.
i think that our need to drink is directly related to our
need to be real...to express our emotions and have them
accepted as part of who we are...yet we cannot believe that
this could actually happen under normal circumstances...so
we introduce two new variables...first , there is the ''i
was drunk" thing...the perfect excuse , we believe, for revealing
what is truly within...and secondly , we also give ourselves
an irrational mind that we can hide behind as the truth
is leaving our mouths...that is , we simply dont give a
fuck...we have the courage to be honest because we , for
a few hours , believe that there are no consequences to
our honesty .
it all points to a desperate need to have love , acceptance
and forgiveness as an essential part of our lives...to be
forgiven and to forgive...what a concept...something that
could potentially heal the world...a wonderful idea...that
never seems to happen...so we find something that will simulate
this dynamic...booze.
we drank through the day and into the night...we learned
much about each other , the boys and i...and then there
were others that joined us...one of which was a beautiful
young lass from england...her hair hanging down in front
of her breasts...but besides that...nothing pissed me off
about her...she was indeed amazing .
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