chapter 47

i was back at cap di again...only ten miles from the nice
airport...i spent the last three days on the nude beach
with a beautiful young lady from paris...we drank together
every night and swam and talked during the day time...the
only thing deeper than her feelings were her needs...this
she did not know...so she couldn't do anything about it .

at two in the morning this huge french man came bursting
into”the dorm”...looking to harass someone...or , maybe , kill...after
five minutes of his hollering , i felt that it was time
to put an end to all of his bullshit...i said politely :”please
put an end to your bullshit”...with that he became enraged...and
within a few seconds...so did i.

i positioned my weight almost perfectly...i knew he was
slow , so i didnt mind taking the time to set him up for
a right hook to the side of the jaw...it was going to shatter
like a glass , being thrown at a retard behind a barb wire
fence...doing a hank williams impression in a road side
bar somewhere in southern georgia....i felt my weight move
forward...then suddenly , the lights were off...nobody turned
them off...it happened by themselves .

i remember walking down a particular street in the city
where i live...i was thinking about an individual that had
attempted to destroy my life just a few week before...i
was enraged as i thought about him...then god said to me...”you
are going to see this person in two minutes time”...as he
appeared on the horizon...my heart was suddenly filled with
love and compassion...it wasnt mine , however , this was
clear to me...it came from something far more merciful and
gentle than i could ever possibly be...it was , indeed ,
divine in nature.

this time was different...so there was a different sort
of miracle...i am afraid of my violent potential...i hope
and pray that god will continue to be with me in such circumstances.

the next morning...as i began my last day in europe...i
was the hero in the hostel...all the pretty young ladies
gave me their pancakes for saving their boyfriends the night
before...as for the young man who caused all the trouble...lets
just say that the innkeeper weighed four hundred pounds...and
could throw two hundred and twenty pounds of shit even farther
than i could.